"Dancers drive themselves, constantly producing a glow that
lights not only themselves but audience after audience."
M. Louis
A classic story. That was what The Nutcracker was and JC only hoped that he could perform it well enough that people would believe the story and his character. A tiny part of him was scared that his current emotional state would hurt his dancing but the moment he stepped on-stage, his mind shut off anything that wasn't a count or a beat. He forgot, for the first time, what pain felt like and only knew how to dance.
*
Justin sat between his mother and his stepmother, his eyes watching every movement that the dancers made, doing the moves with them in his head sometimes. His eyes riveted to JC's body when he entered the stage and he couldn't but be in awe of the dancer. It didn't matter that he had dated him once, had made love to him, had loved him, because at the moment, JC was a dancer. He was born to be a dancer; anyone would be able to tell just by watching him this very moment. He was at ease on the stage with the lights finding his every movement and the music forming to fit his dancing.
Without thinking, he reached over and grabbed his mom's arm, squeezing lightly and when her hand went over his, he looked over at her quickly. He bit his lip before he looked to JC on the stage and back to his mom and she nodded in understanding, squeezing his hand once before letting him continue watching JC dance.
*
The crowd's thunderous applause was not lost on JC, but when he moved forward to take his curtain call, his eyes scanned the front rows of the front mezzanine automatically, just like he did when he and Justin were together. When Justin was nowhere to be found, JC felt a settling in his stomach that wasn't there while he was dancing. He put a soft smile on his face as he stepped back into the line of dancers, not daring to let emotion flicker across his face until he could get out of costume and make-up.
*
"JC," a voice stopped the dancer on his way out of the hall. Justin was standing outside and JC walked over to him immediately. "You looked great up there."
"Thank you," he said as calmly as he could. "I didn't think you were here; I didn't see you with the other dancers."
"I was sitting with my family." He paused. "My mom would like to meet you, if you don't mind. She thought you were beautiful on the stage." JC nodded and followed Justin to where his family was, seeing his brothers and stepmother and father, but also seeing two more people. "Mom, this is JC Chasez. JC, this is my mother, Lynn. And well, the rest of the family."
"It's nice to meet you," JC said with a smile on his face.
"It's a pleasure," Lynn replied. "You looked amazing on that stage. It makes me appreciate the dance even more."
"Well, thank you, that's always wonderful to hear. One can never really get used to that." JC actually blushed lightly.
Lynn glanced at Justin who was trying to look anywhere but JC. "We were actually going to go get some coffee and dessert. Would you like to join us?" Justin's head shot up at the invitation but he just pulled his coat tighter around himself when Lynn looked over at him again.
JC smiled, "Thank you for the offer, but I actually have to finish packing."
"Packing?" Justin couldn't help but ask.
"Packing," JC repeated with mirth in his voice as he looked at Justin. "I'm leaving tomorrow." He turned back to Lynn, "To go home for the holidays," he explained. "So as much as I would love to get to know Justin's family, I'm going to have to decline, or at least take a rain check."
"Of course," Lynn said. "It was nice meeting you."
"It was wonderful meeting you," JC said. "All of you." He turned to Justin. "I'll see you after the holidays."
"See you."
*
On the short plane ride from New York to Maryland, JC finally let his body relax. As much as he loved ballet, he sometimes needed a break and he hadn't had a chance to take a break from it in a long while. He breathed in deeply, letting it out slowly and he stared out the window into the December sky that was just waking up. Soon, he would be home and he could let his mind and body breathe in the simplicity of life.
Being a ballet dancer was hard work, he knew that when he first started dancing. Becoming one of the most sought-out dancers of his time was even tougher; there was always the feeling of being watched after but he knew he would never give it up for anything. He loved to be watched, loved to be the beautiful dancer, loved the exhilaration of being on a stage. But for the next week, he could just enjoy being JC Chasez, the boy from Maryland who just happened to dance.
*